It’s that time of year when we run “fooku”, Portland Food and Drink’s annual food haiku contest. The last two years, we had a panel of judges narrow down the entries, and readers voted for the top three. We’ll be doing the same thing this year, but we’ve also partnered with the Portland Indie Wine Festival for a nice prize. This year’s winner will receive two two-day tickets to the Portland Indie Wine Festival Grand Tastings May 3rd and 4th (a value worth $200.00).
The rules are pretty simple. It must be in haiku format. The ancient art of haiku requires precision: a five syllable first line; seven syllable second line; and five syllable third line. The best haiku features a final line that works like a friendly elbow in the ribs. We only ask that the haiku be about food or wine. Bonus points if it is about wine in Portland. Oh, and since the prize is to a wine festival, only those 21 and over in age can participate.
We’ll collect entries for 7 days and choose the winners on Wed. April 30th. Feel free to post them here under comments. Judges (mostly writers for this site), will narrow down the top ten for you to vote on. Please, no more than four entries per person. Everyone have fun with it! Please leave your entries in the comments.
Some winners from the past few years:
CookForHire:
sound of meat browning
feel of knife through vegetable:
a true cook’s reward
Womby:
at last, no jacket
instead, i grab sunglasses
soon come the favas
Truth:
airy is the crumb
earthy, this crust of Pearl
heavenly, the smell
By Fathom:
Now forego the fork
Hold close this slice of heaven
Perfect on a crust
By Pam:
Champagne, strawberries
and you, here in my warm bed.
Who cares if it rains?
By Witzend:
How bad could it be?
Real bad. Think Hung Far Low bad.
Ok, fine! YOU choose.
About the Portland Indie Wine Festival: The Portland Indie Wine Festival is a juried wine competition celebrating Oregon’s top small producers – those who make 2,000 cases or fewer for the current vintage. Fifty-seven wines from 40 producers were selected in a comprehensive blind tasting conducted on March 10th, 2008. The judging panel consisted of 12 wine professionals from around the country, including winemaker Randall Grahm (Bonny Doon Vineyards), wine writer Tina Caputo (Harpers UK, San Francisco Chronicle, Wine Enthusiast), winemaker Luisa Ponzi (Ponzi Winery), sommelier Erica Landon (Ten 01), restaurateur Randy Goodman (Bar Avignon), Rebecca Murphy (founder of the Dallas Morning News Wine Competition) and others. Nearly 20 top local restaurants and food purveyors will share the stage with 40 Indie winemakers during the two-day Grand Tasting. This year’s outstanding restaurant lineup features Biwa, Broder, Clyde Common, Country Cat, Gilt Club, Simpatica Catering, Ten 01, Wildwood, and many more. To see a full list of selected wineries and restaurant partners, please visit www.indiewinefestival.com.








Seek the perfect fruit
transformed by obsessive hands.
This is good coffee.
Tender leaves of green,
Cheese and oil make you sing.
Pesto: Food of gods.
Abandoned mid-meal
Wherefore art thou, waiter fair?
Portland service sucks.
Pompous food, no dice
Plagiarism cannot save
Au revoir, Chef Stu
Fungus smell of earth
Poking gently through the soil
Hidden gems of life
Ode to St. Cupcake
I sing your praises yet grieve
My vanished figure
oil and ethanol
rice and flour and eggs too
whither restaurants
hands and earth collide
together we harvest fresh hope
Sauvie Island bliss
stinky cheese is best
oozing forth my nose feels blessed
reward of full taste
oh rock star waitstaff
please bring us our bill or die
my plate so empty
breakfast rules the day
people wait two hours no prob
coffee placates some
Zen Master Baker
enlightenment is but a
warm cookie away
Perfect barbecue.
Spicy, sweet, hot, lingering.
No kiss is equal.
He cooked with passion.
The real reason we broke up?
Knives in dishwasher.
Sunday brunch–whisking:
“My sauce is separating!”
One day so did we.
Family in town.
Table for twenty-seven.
“buffet-style?” stampede!
The yogurt parfait:
Ratio is essential.
Too much fruit! Ruined!
Warm is the fire
Cava bubbles sting thy nose
Sing Happy Belly!!!
Stomp the grapes she shouts
and I pulverize the lot
like I Love Lucy
Hook nosed bartender
Fierce sentinel of liquor
Pour me another.
a drunken sunrise
head pounds, stomach churns, thank God
O’Connors’ bloodies
Madisyn and Max
play tag between the tables
Happy screams! Check, please
service night lover
take a seat take a small plate
take care of your own
P.inot by the glass
D.eep pockets for a bottle
X.anadu vitis
P.outine, coming soon?
D.onuts reworked with bacon
X.ero transfats? Ha!
P.eruse the reviews
F.ood, service, decor. Discuss.
D.onations? Paypal.
C.ocktails start the flow
O.pinions the elixir
M.aybe he’s food-dude?
oops, there are two fookus there. they were supposed to be separated by a line.
Gruner veltliner
Grapefruity friend in a glass
At long last, summer.
No reservations!
These policies bother me.
Communal tables.
I stole the first word of this fooku from an earlier post so if I win I will promise to bring lacocina to the wine festival as my guest.
Zen hot dog vendor
Make me one with everything
With extra relish.
Muchas gracias themick!-LaCocina
Haute Tasting
So close we drew in
Lined up in wight rows to see
Sir in charge pouring.
(hint: 3 Oregon wineries are lurking in my fooku)
Localvore warriors
Sustainable foot soldiers
War of hearts and minds
Poet’s dilemma:
Enjoys food, but like vampire,
He does not drink . . . wine.
tacos, tacos, yes!
tacos, tacos, tacos? yes!
tacos, tacos…yes!
oh my gosh this made me laugh. love it!
purple stains my thighs
i stumble home, the day won
my rose city crush
Brush. Walk. MAX. Push. Squeeze.
Egalitarian? Yes.
My donut yours? No.
four in the morning
sick and tired of the Pearl
where’s Quality Pies?
slinky saucy minx
winking like you’ve seen me bare
country cat, my love
“botry-tryst”
in hills of dundee
did a noble love affair
rot upon the vine
pine state biscuit stand
one hour for sausage gravy
but there is no more
From farmer to chef
And food critic to wine snob
Portland’s food joins us
DrinkS PinoT by DaY
VelveT StaineD LipS TelL me He’S
ThreE BucK ChucK in BeD.
sooty? fruity? huh?
three bucks well spent. covet my
pedestrian taste
prince or pauper – All
can eat truffled things when hours
happily align
You all amaze me with your creativity. Anyway, the wine festival starts one week from tonight, so we’ll keep this going for a few more days!
spare some change? no, but,
want these leftovers? uh, well,
is it like, vegan?
this only makes sense as a fooku when taken in the proper context, ducking in from the pdx rain to a restaurant:
wet, hoodie, sweatpant
does anyone care? of course
not, look at that guy
inhale swirls of cab
palate warmed, bask in the fire
newly lit like me
Supper Club down out
Beast back better than ever
phoenix from fire
garlicky morsel
rolls under the chair, oh-oh…
ah! five second rule!
Quinoa intrigues me.
I try it. Kinda plain. Bragg’s?
What would Incans think?
foie gras, organ meats
sublime treats from funny cuts
figure it out, dude.
(not food dude)
“his last meal”
grilled jarlsberg sandwich
a bowl of tomato soup
a glass of malbec
Endless winter mist
Stems glisten on the table
Pinot noir, my love.
Oregon pinot
Lush velvet on yearning lips
Harsh on poor checkbook
Sir more wine we pray
Tonight we sup like royals
Then out the back, slip
Okay, we are closing the contest for judging. Thanks to everyone who entered. We’ve sent them to our judging panel, and will have the top 6 for you to vote on late tomorrow. If you have entered, be sure to check back, as the event is this weekend!